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Mail For Statler

8/17/2011

 
Today was kind of hard.  Good but hard.  Sometimes on the farm it is easier to pretend things didn't happen and just go on that way.  Then something will happen that reminds you that things aren't the same or that someone is missing.  That is what happened today.  It started out that Mom got mail.  When you live in the country something are done different.  For example when you get a package you don't go to the post office to pick it up.  Instead you get a post-it note left on your daily mail.  "You got a package" and the Date Signed by our Mail lady Jane. 
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Then you venture over to a prearranged hiding spot and pick up your mail. 
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At our house it is the old shed we hide the lawnmower in.  It is also where I am allowed to tag when I want to play with the remains of old spray paint.
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Oh My if it isn't from Ms. Adelaide herself.  Mom let me open it.  One look inside and I knew what it was.  I got one of those lumps in my throat.  You know the kind.  It wasn't bad just a bit of hurt I think.  Like when you have to do something you don't want to kind of lumps.
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This is also the thing that brought me back from my pretend world where Statler was still out at the barn and still with me here on Earth.  I had a task that I was proud to do because Statler deserved it but it was also one that hurt to do.  Look at all the bulbs.  Mom soaked them just to give them time to recoop and get a good drink before they went in the ground.
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I don't know if any of you remember but awhile back my Mom tried a plant swap with some others.  She mailed out a ton of Chocolate Mint in hopes that it would make it through the mail and to new homes so that we would be a real part of your home.  Well, These bulbs are the only ones My Mom got in return.  And she is very proud of them.  Ms. Adelaide, being a kind and thoughtful soul also included some extras for me to put on Statler's Ground. 
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I didn't want to think about what I was doing but some how I just couldn't help it.  I dug a bed for the bulbs just on the other side of the fence because even though I couldn't put them right on Statler's Ground (the horses and cattle would eat them away)  I wanted them to mark Statler's Ground for the rest of the world to see and Statler to enjoy.  I hope that one day I will look out and the whole fence is lined with them.
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I planted the bulbs and said a little pray that they would grow and ease the pain in my heart that happens everytime I think about Statler and how I let him down. 
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Then like a good farmer I watered the spot with the post that marked the ground and walked away.   Trying with all my might to get back to that pretend world where Statler was still here. 
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I know it looks bare now but In the spring I pray with all my might that the Grave will be grown over with Grass and Ms. Adelaide's Iris will be in full bloom.  
    After that the day seemed to drag on.  I helped Mom and she made me get some more work done on the new Duck Pond as we call it. 
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I did manage a few chuckles today thanks to Donald the Duck.  He went after Mom's White legs because she was wearing shorts.  She got mad and he got put in the duck play pen.  Is this what you call grounding a Duck???
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Anna
8/17/2011 11:18:13 am

Good ole' Adelaide. :)

I've not seen you without your glasses in your pictures before....hope you didn't lose them!!! ;)

Adelaide
8/17/2011 12:13:13 pm

I'm glad the package arrived so quickly, but I am sorry that I may have contributed to making you sad. I would never, ever want to do that. I just thought you might like to know that there are other people out there who think about Statler too.

Keep the bulbs well watered while they get used to living in Oklahoma, and I'm sure you'll get some flowers next spring -- and then more every year after that. (If they don't, let me know and I'll send more.)

But I don't like that you said that you still feel you let Statler down. That simply is not true and you must not think that way. OK??

Hugs -- Adelaide

Susan (sjanova)
8/17/2011 01:15:20 pm

I loved your post about the "naked ladies" and they certainly looked quite lovely. And I enjoyed the posts about the fair. You did nicely, as did your mom (hey, you need some good competition out there, you know).

But I especially wanted to say that you definitely did NOT let Statler down. Please instead remember the good times that he had playing around and making you laugh. Of course he is always going to be with you and his friends in the flock (well, they won't remember him as well as you always will). The flowers will be nice, but they will mostly be a memory spot for you and your family. Statler will be stronger in your heart, I know.

RJ
8/17/2011 01:40:55 pm

Thank you all for your concern but I know that I didn't let Statler down the way you think but I wasn't there for him the way I should have been. My whole family got so busy with other things like going to Mississippi, hay season and then getting ready for the fair. I just didn't give him 150% I know it wasn't my fault that he passed but he was my responsibility. His life along with every other life on this farm are my family's responsiblity and we take pride in that. In Statler's death I am now responsible for his resting spot and I will continue to care for him and his spot always. Again Thanks but really it isn't meant the way you think I just don't think I am saying it very well.

Christy
8/17/2011 04:15:26 pm

What I think RJ is trying to say is that by pretending nothing happened He is letting Statler down in Death. Our beliefs are that sometimes things die but it always for a reason. It is our job to find the reason and learn from it. We did learn from Statler's death but acting as if it didn't happen doesn't show respect of him life. Ask not for whom the bell tolls ... It tolls for thee ...

Adelaide
8/18/2011 02:31:24 am

Statler is still with you in your heart and always will be. They say that those who live in the hearts of those they leave behind never die. I think that is true. The innocent creatures we love stay with us always.


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